I'm soaked with sweat, my shirt is damp. I think I'm getting Writers Cramp - Dave Crawley

I think I'm having writers block (even if I'm not a real writer). I always imagined writers block to be something like a haze in your brain which didn't let you think at all- maybe that's what it is,

         but for me writers block is period of time, when I think A LOT and I have TONS of ideas but the moment I come to the now faar to familiar webpage which is my blog and start writing, the words stop flowing, like they'd rather stay in my head then leave.

My conclusion is that my head is such an interesting place, my thoughts would rather stay there and go sightseeing than get forced onto a piece of paper or in this case a hypertext-ed document on the World Wide Web (I found a fancy way to say 'webpage'. Haha I could become a writer after all :)   

            Here I am, not really a writer, (just a person who writes because she likes to) and complaining about writers block. I really can't imagine how it would be for a REAL writer, here's to all my favorite writers-because they're positively inspirational!

1. Frank Delaney:
   This isn't in any particular order-but Frank Delaney was the first writer who came into my mind. He's spectacular, he's vivid and he's a storyteller. His works (I've read only two-and that too in the wrong order but I still loved them) are soo descriptive-he weaves a beautiful story set mostly in the 1950's Ireland, a place which seems to be flowing with words, the time and place are so beautiful-he really brings them back to life. He really knows how to write a story!
2. Eva Ibbotson:
   She's always going to be my favorite author! Eva Ibbotson writes stories set in wartime Europe and she captures the peace and indifference of all those places protected from all the fighting. Whats most attractive about her writing is how she seems to still live in that time-she draws you to that time herself- the writing is perfect, there's not a trace of the 21st century...its just pure wartime Europe. Like every other good writer, you find yourself inside her books and unwilling to leave-but here's what makes her special, it feels like she's letting you steer the book. Let me explain: her writing, it isn't strong and commanding, it doesn't feel like she's writing the story and determining the fate of her characters-it feels like she's merely suggesting the next turn of events. You can almost see the bend in the path and in a way she kinda makes you feel like it was your idea all along. Its beautiful and satisfying...a lazy-summer-afternoon-read.
3. J.K Rowling
   
   All hail the queen! I'm a crazy Harry Potter fan, even though I only discovered the awesomeness of the book series much after I watched the movies. I thought that the Harry Potter series was too mainstream-everyone seemed to like it- and that's why I didn't read it, but one day I did (I don't know why, I just did) and I was hooked(haha). Its a whole other world, with so much familiarity yet so many differences, I learned to love that world. (I also learned to long for a letter from Hogwarts)No wonder everyone loved it! Thats when I decided to give mainstreamed things a chance :)  
4. Annie Dalton
   Not very famous (or maybe she is, its just that I don't know too much about her) for it but
   
   Annie Dalton wrote the Angels Unlimited series. She writes in the sarcastic, quirky and smart voice of a teenage girl...and I admire her writing so much. I think it was she who inspired me to start a blog (though not directly), I try to sound like her a lot (failing utterly), I love the British slang and the street smart dialogues-shes definitely my dream writer. I want to be able to develop my own style just like her.

(Is it just me or do Eva Ibbotson and Frank Delaney look alike?)

 While I was writing this I found something in common in all these writers (apart from their eerie face identical-ness, i think its just the pictures), they all have their stories set in exotic places-and they describe these places so well that it feels like I'm actually on vacation.

Eva Ibbotson- The amazon rainforest; the wartime Austro-Hungarian empire; Wartime Germany; Wartime Central Europe

Annie Dalton- Heaven! (its a city in her book :), ancient Japan, Crusades period in the middle East etc. (the book features time-travel haha)

Frank Delaney- beautiful Ireland

J.K Rowling- Hogwarts

Blog Makeover :)

I know this might be a little irrelevant..nothing to do with being a teenager in California at all but..
           
                      Ive been feeling like a little (that's me-language for really really) down, maybe even a bit depressed, The only thing that makes me feel better when Im depressed, is a major shopping spree and a complete makeover followed by a very serious bathroom selfie photo shoot with my besties :)
   
                 Considering that's no longer possible...I decided to give my blog a makeover and you know what? Ive never had so much fun on a computer before! (okay at times it got a bit annoying, I mean working with HTML is like writing broken up English all over the place..but I survived, the only that HAS gone wrong is my twitter timeline, which is at the bottom of the page and my Instagram which is right next to my twitter timeline...it was a disaster :)

                 So I'm just going to give you a guide to my new-and-improved-version of my blog :)

• Well on the top of the page, Ive got 2 new pages! One is a simple "About Me" page and the other links to my Twitter  (i had to put that Twitter page in following the disaster of my Twitter widget, which still wont come off the bottom of my blog...if you think Im kidding you should scroll down and see for yourselves)
• I changed the template, that's only because I thought the my old one distracted too many people, I used to get comments like "I love the background!" or "Your blog is really pretty!" I was starting to think no one actually read it..

Ok Ive got nothing else....I felt really accomplished because these 2 minor changes actually took me almost half of a lazy Saturday morning..

Also, me and my friend Misha (check out her google plus, shes an amazing blogger!)are going to do collaboration posts on her blog The Weirdo Chronicles (it even sounds fun doesn't it?) We're going to be reviewing chick flicks and actually digging them up deeper than any English teacher could ever go :p, Please check them out :)

*image theres a funny caption here*

            

Act your age!

The Oxford Dictionary defines Coming of Age as-
                                        A young persons transition from childhood to adulthood.

That is pretty simple, but I'd like to elaborate, I think that this"transition" from childhood to adulthood occurs through a number of stereotyped problems...or rites of passage. The problems which everyone of us teenagers go through...    
                     To experience these rites of passage are a part of growing up, these experiences are what make our life, are they not? So I watched a movie today- Girl In Progress, well when I saw the poster, I expected to be a chick-flick (or a rom-com) just my kinda movie...but turns out it was one of those movies which made me think..

       
                 The movie introduced me to "Coming of Age" literature and made me recognize it as a separate genre. To make its very long and extremely complicated story short..See the little girl in the picture? She decided that shes gonna speed up growing up and made a list of all the rites of passage for growing up [which she got from movies like Mean Girls, Uptown Girls, Nanny Diaries etc. etc. (or as my brother calls them "girl movies"- for being dreamy and beautiful but also fake)]

Her list went something like this--

1.  Steal money for makeover
2. Be a bitch and impress popular girls
3. Have a teacher as a mentor, making sure that she notices my untapped talents
4. Hang with popular girls and let down mentor so that she calls my mom
5. Let down mom by playing "loud music"
6. Get invited to coolest party and loose virginity to the stupidest, most insensitive douchebag in the school.
7. Move to New York and start a new life

I know I make it sound really bad, I know I make it sound crazy...but I still think shes got the right idea, I mean no one CAN grow up without actually going through the rites of passage...
I've thought about them, and here they are-

• Want independence... that's why there are so many tantrums, parents don't want to let go and kids feel trapped.
• Rebellion...i think this is aftermath of the sudden feeling of being caged at home..We're just bursting out of those houses. (Hence the punk clothes and the douchey attitude)
• Losing Control...I may sound like an adult when I say this and I do feel like a bit of traitor when I type this out but, after some time, teenagers loose sight of the end goal, the whle idea of annoying the parents and going with the flow blinds everything out. The stage of never being sober is here!
• Realizing your mistakes and cleaning up....just in time for graduation :)

I know that sounded like I was criticizing the teenage ways or whatever, but what I actually was doing was appreciating them, you learn valuable lessons from all of this!
                 When parents don't let us out of the house we jump the fence!...There's that feeling of invincibility, the ceiling cant hold us can it? How are we going to ever learn if we don't make those mistakes? Going through those rites of passage are super important...maybe our parents think they can "protect" us from them, the parties, the drugs and the alcohol but we all know that the overprotective parents produce the sneakiest kids..

I know its cliche for me to now say that its all parents fault, but it isn't. They just gotta know when to let go and when to be there for us, which can be tough considering how moody I am most of the time.(So Im automatically going to assume that most people having swinging moods too :)
                  What I think is, you have to be a teenager, make those mistakes without completely letting go of that safety bar. On the other hand you can't just hold onto that bar and think about your future..that's not living.
                        I don't want to live the teenage life my parents want me to live, but hey! its my life I'll live it just the way I want to..
                     But remember we're all going to learn a lesson, because we are all going to make mistakes...That's what being a teenager is all about, its about making mistakes but learning from them.
                    So that's what it is...your gonna learn something, but right now lets have some fun!

FML

i fucking hate my parents

God my laptops broken and they wont get me a new one nd i have like 3 bs nd i cant do anything

i cannot tolerate bs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i want like straight as
how am i going to get that without my laptops (im using my DADs laptop now!)

i mean like wat the fuck is their problem? how can i surviv without a COMPUTER?

this fucking sucks!

im just angry all day long, i have to go to the library or school to like acess the internet!

this is unfuckingbelievable

and i jst read wat i just wrote...omg i swear a lot

but srsly my life sucks.,.....i miss my laptop!!!!

That was an email i sent my friend last week, and i thought i dont know how to be angry
but sometimes parents make me super angry
maybe thats why i didnt get my mom anything for mothers day this year -_-